dreams have changed

Last night, after some deliberation, I decided that when I wake up this morning, I'd get my coffee and read in bed for at least an hour. That was one of my favorite things to do about 5 years ago... since then, life has changed a good bit and gotten a lot busier.
So, I woke up and started the coffee.. while it was brewing I wanted to check in on the Guatemala blogs. Other people had posted some new stuff as well... Now, half an hour later, I realized that my dreams have changed.
I will always love to read in bed. It's a wonderful way to spend a rainy afternoon. This a small piece of the puzzle.. Last night, I wasn't going to read so that I could pack (which is becoming more and more urgent.) Now, I'm not reading my fiction novel because connecting and creating is just more important to me.
There's more to life than I've ever realized before. I love that I've learned so much about who I am and what my dreams are in the past few months. I didn't figure everything out when I was 18 or when I got married. And I'm not planning on having it all down when I turn 25 or 40.
Getting into heaven isn't what being a Christian is all about. We follow Christ here on earth to know and share His love. When you aren't so consumed with the destination alone, you're much more free to enjoy the journey. Cliche as that may be, I'm still getting it.

my purpose

I've been wanting to start blogging for awhile. Last semester, my teacher told us (as English majors) that each one of us should absolutely be doing it- but I haven't. Now, with Guatemala, California and who knows what else coming up, it's time.
This past weekend I took a road trip with a friend to visit Morning Star. Our time at the church was awesome, but I was most encouraged by our conversations during the 9 hour drives to and from SC. Last week, while at work, I realized how much I long for connection with people. My mom works with me and I noticed how much I try to talk to her.. not about anything important, I just want to be feeding that relationship. I'll tell her how nice my highlighter is working if there's nothing else to say, just to feel close. When I told Katie this, I half expected her to give me a strange look and change the subject, but then she said... "me too!"
People are so relational. We long to be connected to others, to be accepted and desired. If we feel it strongly enough to make somewhat pointless conversation, how much more must God be longing for our constant attention and affection?
Paul encourages us to pray without ceasing, and while I definitely believe this is for our own growth and well-being, I also believe that God is a lover yearning to be close to us.
I know how strong that hope is in me, and there's no one else who can satisfy that hunger like He can. I believe that's what we were created for.. relationship with God and with each other. Everything else is mundane. How awesome is it that God wants to enjoy us as we enjoy Him??